It’s been a long day, people.  And my emotions have been up and down.  I’m exhausted but I would not be able to go lay down without writing this first and getting some things off my mind.  To adequately describe my day, I have to start from the beginning.  First of all, we got up and were so excited because Ryan did not ever get a call from Coach to come over here and do the website, so we got to sleep late.  After we got up we called my dad because he had left a message-we talked to them about what we were going to do while we were in Biloxi, and what time we were leaving here in the morning, etc., etc.  Then we decided that it was time for us to get going and go get things done that needed to be done before we left.  We had to go to the post office and mail packages, go to the car inspection place and get my car inspected, go to the bank and cash/deposit checks, and go to Walmart.  And we couldn’t be gone that long because the guy was supposed to be coming to fix the apartment.  So Ryan and I were getting ready to go and we were compiling all of our cash into one so that we could have it to spend on our trip this weekend…we are going to Biloxi.  Well, lo and behold, Ryan’s wallet is missing.  So after getting in a little tiffy about that and realizing that yes, before every vacation we take a lovely trip to the DMV, we depart on our way.  We go to the DMV without speaking the whole way, hardly, and get there and get that done.  Didn’t even take that long, really.  And after that we were fine and happy with each other again-haha.  Then we went to the bank, and I got one check cashed and the other deposited.  After that, we went to get my inspection sticker.  Then we went all the way to the Post Office on Perkins because we wanted to go eat on that side of town.  So we mailed some things (one being my engagement ring, which makes me VERY nervous because I don’t like sticking something so valuable in the mail.  I got delivery confirmation on it, though).  Then we went to Walmart.  You must know that I cannot STAND Walmart.  As Ryan put it, “people look so sad in Walmart’.  And they truly do.  That’s because they are slowly dying as they maneuver through the aisles…that includes us, people.  So we get there and we got some stuff that we needed for our trip, then we went to go eat.  We came home in the horrible 5:00 traffic.  We got home, and were not even here for 10 minutes before my landlord knocked on the door and said “He’s not here yet fixing the house?  I talked to him about an hour ago and he said he was on his way.”  Well nope, and guess what??? We still haven’t seen him!!! Maybe he’ll come for a nightcap around midnight.  I told her in the meantime that he would not be able to get in here this weekend because Ryan and I would be out of town, and he’d have to come next week.  Ryan and I find it strange that she is hiring this guy but can’t get a straight answer about what TIME he’s going to be here.  I know I’d never pay someone money and they’d be like “Yeah I’ll get over there when I can.”  I’d immediately call someone else who could at LEAST give me an approximation.  Seriously, unprofessional.  So then I checked my messages, and there was the lovely expected message from my mom.  I was expecting it, people.  You see, my brother is getting married next weekend, if you’d read some of my other blog posts, then you know that.  Well, I have finally decided that Ryan and I are going on Friday (she wanted me to come on Thursday because “my family really never sees me”.).  Well we’re going on Friday, and we’re coming home first thing Sunday morning. We’d come home Saturday night but the wedding is at 6:30, so we’d be getting home really late, and we don’t want to drive that late at night.  So we’re coming back the next morning.  Anyways, I had e-mailed to let her know that, and to tell her that I got reimbursed for the hotel stay, which I put on her credit card.  Now, first you must know how much money my mother has.  She is RICH.  I mean, lives in a $925,000 house rich.   So the hotel reimbursement check was for $497.  I asked her if I could keep the check to put in my savings account.  Well when she called today she sounded very irritable, so I called her back anyway because otherwise she wouldn’t have let it rest.  First of all, she started talking about wedding clothes.  She had come up to the school last Thursday to pick up some clothes that I didn’t want that she had bought for me, and she just gave me ANOTHER bag of clothes that same day.  Well strangely enough there were some things in there that I did like, and since I hate buying dress clothes, I decided to keep some things.  So I told her on the phone which things I was picking, and she said that she was coming down here on Tuesday and she is stopping by here to get the clothes to return to steinmart, and she can just look at the outfits that we have and we can pick which ones I’m wearing to what event for the wedding weekend.  PUKE.  So of course, me being the little pushover that I am, I agreed.  The truth is, it’s easier to agree.  I had gotten stronger at one point and would’ve never let her over here.  The fact of the matter is that we’re living out of three rooms (and one is the bathroom) right now because of the apartment being repaired, so I know that she is going to think this place is a wreck, and I used to would’ve gotten myself all sick about cleaning it up for her, but you know what, this time I just don’t CARE.  I don’t CARE if she thinks it’s messy and disgusting and not up to her taste.  I don’t have two maids that come once a damn week…and she only has two people living in a 4 bedroom house!!!!  And 1 cat! I’ve got 3 cats, a lovebird, and 2 people living in a 2 bedroom apartment that is half-liveable right now, so if it’s a little messy and congested, then she can literally GET OVER IT.  I’m tired of having to stress myself out to make other people happy.  If she’s gonna push her way over to my place, then that’s whatever, but I’m not going to go out of my way when she’d probably find something to complain about anyway.  So anyway, that’s fine-I’ll pal around with her and go shopping and do all that junk with her on Tuesday.  Then she kept repeatedly telling me that I “needed to be sure to get myself an appointment to go and get my hair highlighted and trimmed before the wedding.”  You know, I’m just not good enough.  She wants me to do all these things to myself so that I’ll be “presentable”, but I probably still won’t be up to her standards.  Last time I got my hair highlighted and cut it was SO cute, but it wasn’t cute enough for her.  She wants my hair much shorter, she wanted my bangs different, she wanted my highlights different.  She always wants something different!!!!  And yet she talks about it being “my problem” that I think that I’m not good enough in my own family’s eyes, but if I was good enough, why would it matter so much to HER if I got my hair highlighted?  Wouldn’t that be up to me?  Why would it matter so much what I’m going to be wearing, I mean does she think I’m gonna show up wearing something trashy?  I have great taste!!!  She just wants me to look like a 40 year old soccer mom, and I am TWENTY SEVEN!  I’ll never be good enough for her.  You know that just makes me ssoooooo ready for this wedding to get over with so that I don’t have to see her butt for the rest of the summer if I don’t want to.  And trust me, I won’t want to.  I forgot to mention that she said “she was going to definitely need that reimbursement check from State Farm, so I couldn’t keep it.”  You know, since they pay $200K a year for a hunting camp, I bet it’s hard to find $500 around to pay a credit card bill.  $500 to me is like hitting the lottery right now, but she acts like we’re spending our money on something illegal or bad or something.  We’re just trying to live!!!  Why did I get her for a mother? I’m adopted and this is what I wound up with.  You know, I know she loves me, and I can’t say that I don’t love her because I do.  But why, oh why, couldn’t I have had SOME sort of normalcy in my life.  I never know what to expect when I get on the phone with her-it’s like talking to someone who is bipolar.  On any other day she might’ve let me keep that money.  Or if I were going to be coming to the wedding on Thursday like she asked me to.  But nope.  And she didn’t even mention that, which I found strange.  I need a nap-I’m starting to get whiny.  Thanks for listening to me complain…..